More Quotables

The following quotes are taken from my 2005 The 365 Stupidest Things Ever Said day-to-day calender. Copyright infrigment lawsuits, here I come!

This amendment does more damage than it does harm.” – Cynthia Willard-Lewis (D-NO)

It is advisable to be two people during assembly.” – Instruction manual for an Ikea desk

I have two weapons – my legs, my arm, and my brains.” – Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick

Stay away from this drum set if an earthquake occurs.” – Warning on Tama brand drums.

I didn’t even know Elvis was from Mepmhis. I thought he was from Tennessee.” – Memphis Grizzlies rookie Drew Gooden.

Sundance [Film Festival] is weird. The movies are weird – you actually have to think about them when you watch them.” – Britney Spears

I’m not Jesus Christ, I’m Bunny.” – English subtitle in a Hong Kong kung-fu movie.

To use an English phrase, he is a host in himself.” – from the English-Chinese Word Ocean Dictionary.

It’s not going to be peaches and gravy all the time.” – Indiana Pacers center Brad Miller, on his team’s struggles.

Do not use the UltraDisc2000 as a projectile in a catapult.” – Warning label on a CD player (winner of the Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch “wackiest warning labels” contest for 2002).

If a person doesn’t have the capacity that we all want that person to have, I suspect hope is in the far distant future, if at all.” – President George W. Bush

My guitars are my umbilical cord. They’re directly wired into my head.” – Kirk Hammett, guitarist for Metallica

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